Well, work has taken all of my focus this week just to get back in the groove. I had wanted to finish up the "dream series" blog that I was writing but until I get back to 100% I think I will put a hold on that. When I do pick it back up it will be with dreams that have came true. I think a good place to start. Until then let me tell you a few short funnies that have happened through out the last two weeks as I love to make people laugh!
So..I am driving down 185th coming back from therapy. I am kind of in la la land as I am on pain meds for my back to begin with so you can imagine my surprise when I see a man on a bicycle crossing the road where he is not supposed to cross. He is trying to cut through traffic in double lanes & we all know how busy 185th is. Him crossing the road incorrectly is not the funny part. The funny part is...now imagine this...he has on the gym short that are elastic (can you see where this is going) and they have slid down to the bottom of his bottom! Cars are slowing down for shock I am sure as I didn't want to see what I saw, but there is was...a full moon shining in the middle of the day & he had no choice but to keep peddling as he needed to get out of the middle of the road! LMAO! As he reached the other side the first thing he did was pull them up!
I can't imagine being him! In the middle of the street knowing your buttocks is showing for all the world to see! I am glad it just didn't slip further! I think I may have needed to go to the next doctor visit which would have been the optometrist! It would have surely put my eyes out!
So moral of the story...just when you think you have witnessed the stranger things in life, something is waiting for you around the corner or should I say crack?
Ok...next funny story....
It is a week night & Cheryl & I are watching TV. I am on the long couch as I was icing my back & she was on the love seat. All of a sudden she ask me do I see that? See what? That huge spider? No! Look at it over here, it is huge! Please remember we are both paralyzed with fear. I slowly move over & holy mother! It is the mother ship of all spiders & I am sure it was looking at us! Cheryl tells me to get the hornet spray as it shoots 20 feet & I am the closet to the kitchen. So stealthily I go & get the spray & the flashlight. I hand the spray to her, we know that she only has this one shot....& she misses! The hornet spray goes all over my plant which is dripping with foam & the spider? Well, he/she whatever it is had high tailed it back up under the entertainment center.
Now we are really petrified knowing he is in the house with us but we can't see him. So, we bravely continue to watch TV & watch for Morgana as I have named the spider. Which was in a fantasy novel I read that she was the largest & evilest of all spiders. Wait....it that Morgana? Why yes...she is venturing out again! Do we miss this opportunity? Yes...she is too fast & ran back under the entertainment center. So for the rest of the night we are done, on eggshells & our nerves are toast.
We never have found that spider....until the next night.....
We are laying in bed & I am exhausted from returning to work so I am right at that point of drifting off to a sleepy slumber. Cheryl is reading a book & just about that time I fade to black...something runs across the top of my chest, close to my throat! Oh My Goodness! I scream! She screams! We grab the covers at the same time & within 1/2 second we are standing the middle of the bedroom floor with a completely stripped bed looking at the mattress. Remember my back is all messed up & moving fast is not in the doctors orders. But there is no spider! What? Then what was it? Then we see what it was flying around the bedroom light a large mosquito. Good Gosh! By now we are both so frazzled & mad we look at each other & almost say at the same time....KILL IT! We needed to squash something as this spider is causing us stress. So Cheryl squashed the mosquito.
Needless to say, it is four days later & we still are walking around looking for Morgana. I am hoping that our wild & crazy Nermal, sweet little kitten that he is has finished him off. But I have no proof, so there still may be a spider among us.
Oh & sad but true the stupid mole in our yard has survived the last attack of fire (see my Mole Wars blog) & there are two new mounds of dirt in our yard. Maybe I should catch the spider & release it in the mole holes hoping he would poison the mole. Only in a perfect world!
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